Social Media Comparisons and How to Stop. 

With the increase in social media platforms and the level of connectivity these platforms create, there is no gainsaying to the fact that social media as a whole is here to stay. Can it ever die down and another trend take over? No, I don’t think so.

I’ve never been a loyal Facebook user, I’ve had the account for a long time, that’s probably everyone’s first social media platform before twitter, Instagram and the rest come to play. I can’t place a finger on why I am not a loyal user though.

As a blogger, I’ve realized the power the internet possesses. Definitely, Facebook is one platform where you get a lot of readers and customers (maybe that’s why I have my reservations, so many things going on there).

This might not be for everyone, but most people, in the course of interacting and getting ideas to help them grow better, tend to focus a lot more of things going on in people’s lives and get ‘motivated’ for the wrong reasons.
I totally love flatlays, they are everywhere on Instagram especially. As a blogger, it’s one thing you most likely delve into. Well, as far as I’m concerned, I would love to try it soon, very soon. I know the necessary equipment are a good camera, a catchy background and definitely beautiful tools to show to the world. Right now, I’m battling with having a phone and I don’t have a ‘worthy’ camera.

In the same vein, if you’re on Instagram, you definitely see a lot of pictures that portray the good lives of people. Someone buys a car, and shows it off on Instagram and you out of nowhere start thinking of owning your car, even though it shouldn’t be a priority right now.

Relationships show offs are also a trend on social media. This will never move me-too being an unapologetic reserved being, my privacy is paramount. Well, his birthday could make me ‘show him off’, but I wouldn’t give a clue he is ‘the one’. Well, except of course, you’re a sensitive being!

Mouth-watering pictures would always motivate you to get off your bed, wear a beautiful outfit and show off to the camera, with all kinds of pose. Well, this happens to me, so I understand. I’m the kind of person that even when I take pictures, I’d scan through a million times to ensure it’s worthy to be posted on instagram. Lol. This is cool until you want to put yourself in a comparison state with others.

There are two types of comparison. The one that makes you better, you get motivated by what’s going on with other people. Not really sure ‘comparison’ is the word. But it’s totally fine if you get challenged to get better. The other type,which is the ‘evil’ is one in which you do all you can to get better than the person or individuals you follow. Then you begin to engage in activities that don’t fit your personality just to have yourself look like other people. Not cool.

Read: Why you should stop comparing yourself to others. 

We all desire to look great and live a pleasant life. Whatever we want for ourselves can be worked for by ourselves, we don’t need to stalk individuals and do everything they do, just to be like them. There is no sense of fulfillment in that.

How do you stop this unnecessary comparison? 

1. Accept yourself.

This might sound cliché, but really, it’s the most important point here. Not accepting yourself will definitely lead you to living a life of pretense and comparison with others.

I’m an introvert with a blog, I know I need to promote my blog which means I have to be open to conversations and engage well with my readers. There’s this other blogger who happens to be an extrovert, getting loads of traffic on her blog, due to her innate ability to interact, convince and engage with other people. If I refuse to understand who I am and accept it, I’d beat myself up for not being in the same position with the extrovert blogger. This is just an illustration. You should know who you are and accept it.

2. Engage in other productive activities.

This is a fact, most of us stay glued to social media platforms even when sleep winks at us. It’s one habit I’m working on, it just has to stop. I discovered the more I stay on Instagram, the more I see pictures of outfits I’d love to see when I get a sewing machine, pictures of colour combination of outfits I’d love to try and so on! Certainly, this prolonged Instagram visit would definitely cause some “I want to be like her, I should start doing this too” thoughts.

Reduce time spent on social media and engage in productive activities such as reading, writing, learning a new skill, exercises and so on.

3. Do what makes you happy.

Here’s the good part- you can get inspired through those pictures. If getting her kind of shoes will make you happy, get them. If her smiles attract you, smile often too. Stay inspired, not intimidated. 

I make conscious efforts to stay inspired which makes me happy. I see pictures and number of followers on some accounts and get motivated to keep up at what I do, embracing the fact that these people didn’t just appear and started making impact. They all started from somewhere! The important thing is to be happy with whatever you do. There’s nothing wrong with getting inspired through pictures of other people.

4. Get better at what you do.

We all have our unique ways of dealing with things. Make efforts to get better at what you do, you’ll be too busy empowering yourself instead of drooling over pictures on instagram. There’s this drive in you, you just have to let it out. The celebrities you follow stayed true to their passion and they are known for it.

It’s never too late to get better. We learn everyday. If it’s sewing, there are tons of videos on YouTube you can learn from. Blogging? There are blogs you can read and learn from. Writing? Keep writing everyday, you can write a book. Counseling? Create a YouTube channel, share your opinions. There are a lot of things you can engage in, you just need to discover that passion and go for it.

5. Celebrate other people.

Why not celebrate these people you look up to and not envy them? Let them know you love them, send a message, it doesn’t hurt. You’ll be surprised at how some of them reply as if they don’t such heartwarming messages (maybe they don’t). Some of them show the love in return. When you do this, it becomes difficult to envy them.

What if they are not celebrities but your friends that just happen to be in luxury? Comparing yourself to them and envying them still won’t get you anywhere. Show them love too. Your friend just bought a car and shows it off, you don’t need to find faults, congratulate him or her.

Comparing yourself to other people on social media is just not right.  You don’t know the source of whatever they have. So many of them smile but that’s probably just for the camera. Most people are wealthy but sad. They have everything but happiness. What exactly will comparison do for you? Nothing.

Embrace who you are, get better at what you do and celebrate other people. It will take nothing from you, but will surely produce a peace of mind.

Love,

Tinuke..

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4 thoughts on “Social Media Comparisons and How to Stop. 

  1. I definitely agree with this post. Comparison is something everyone struggles with sometimes and the best way to get over it is being happy for the people you are comparing yourself too and accepting yourself while also working hard and relentless to get better at what you do. The post hits the nail on the head absolutely!

    My Fashion Musings

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, I have realized that myself. Most times, it isn’t deliberate, we just find ourselves drooling over other people’s lives.
      I’m glad you agree with it. Thanks for reading!

      Like

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